I have finished my taxes.

I am calm! I am zen! I am happy these days!

Let’s look at my tab, eh?

Federal taxes owed: $11.

Whew! Dodged that bullet! I was afraid I’d owe more, even though I hardly made any money last year, what with temping, limited freelancing, moving, and general povertitious behaviors.

Adopted-home-state-Illinois taxes owed: $162 refund for 7 months of resident employment.

CHA-CHING! Yaaaaaay, monies back, yaaaaaaaay! I love Chicago!

New York taxes owed, with exactly 12 days of non-resident employment accumulated in 2007(hey, if I’m crashing on someone’s floor during weekdays, and at my folks on weekends? I’m a fudgin’ migrant worker, okay?): $251.

Twelve.

Days.

Two hundred and fifty-one dollars.

This muhfu…

Zen!

Happy!

I’m not there anymore!

I have a spacious cheap apartment in an incredibly vibrant neighborhood, and a job I enjoy, and am surrounded by people I like! Hahahahapppppy!

I will not sacrifice my contentment and health to that soul-sucking vortex again. Ha!

(Have you ever wanted to plot the downfall of an entire land mass? Because I do, right now. I want all of New York City to fucking toss my unwashed salad…ugh. UGH.)

Dear New York,

STOP. FUCKING. RAPINGMYWALLETIDON’TEVENLIVEINYOURHELLACIOUSPITSANYMOREWHYAREYOUSTILLBLEEDINGMEDRY!?!?!?

That’s okay. I mean, between the IL refund and the $600 tax rebat, I’ll be able to cover it. But honestly, and this is a rare emotion for me these days, I COULD CHOKE someone right now. Unbefuckinglievable.

In other news, I have made my first mac and cheese (fatty as all get-out with four cheeses AND bacon crust), I have an honest-to-god bed and several chairs scored at a thrift shop, I continue to inexplicably lose weight despite minimal gym attendance on my part, I have looked evil in the eye (and lost), and I am happily three chapters into Dorothy West’s “The Living is Easy.”

Oh, and I signed up for eHarmony, for what that’s worth.

How are you?


36 Responses to “It is tax season, tra la, tra la.”

  1. 1 M-shel

    oh dam, oh dam, OH.DAM…I should not have clicked on the ice cream link. This is the HD answer to the now defunct B&J “Honey I’m Home”…and I want some RIGHT NOW!

    eHarmony rejected me…THREE TIMES in the same number of years. I’m chalking it up to my atheist/no children stance, even if it’s just because I’m just a freak and they don’t want peeps like me on there!

  2. 2 K.

    eharmony? Good luck with that. I got a lot of ultra conservative deacons/sunday school teachers.

  3. 3 sid

    Eh, in three days I’ve gotten like 20 “matches,” and all seem like nice enough people, but almost no one is local. The coolest guys keep ending up being Australian, which is pissing me all the way off. I can’t fly to melbourne for a date! I need to adjust my settings.

    But anyway.

    Yeah. That ice cream kicked all kinds of ass.

    I will never eat it again.

  4. 4 UltraMag

    Damn indulgent weblinks! I’m such a Haagen-whore!

    *burns rubber to the nearest supermarket*

    Good luck with eHarmony! My cousin found a Chiropractor on that site, and last time I checked (a few months ago), they were doing VERY well.

    That reminds me – I should call her to catch up, and make sure that he’s not a serial killing chiropractor or anything… I’m just sayin! :-/

  5. 5 V.

    Dude, I want that Mac and Cheese recipe. That just sounds too good for words. And I know that bacon makes everything better.

  6. 6 sid

    That ice cream is the debil.

    I had some more last night. I’m on my second pint in two weeks. That NEVER happens. Except with this, and HD’s sticky toffee pudding ice cream. Must avoid!

    Shel’, eHarm apparently rejects almost a fifth of it’s applicants, so I wouldn’t be too worried. Accounts vary, but it sounds like there could be a number of reasons you aren’t accepted, from answering similar questions inconsistently (in which case they think you must be lying) to “obstreperousness” as they call it. Maybe they just know none of their current members would suit you, so they won’t take your money! That’s a blessing in disguise, I’d reckon.

    But UltraMag, I keep hearing stories like yours, so I’m trying it out!

    Viv, I unfortunately didn’t follow a recipe, so the measures were basically: 1/2 box gemelli, boiled; 4 oz. colby and jack blend, 4 oz. medium cheddar, shredded, 3 oz. gorgonzola, crumbled, 1/4 c lowfat milk poured over the mess, and diced, semicooked bacon on top, stuck in the oven at 375 for as long as was necessary to get the bacon crisp and the cheese gooey. Oh, and onions. there was a half a large onion, diced and caramelized in there too!

  7. 7 harper

    sid,

    i’m going to make that mac & cheese this wkend. sounds delish. i can savor it now. thanks!

  8. 8 M-shel

    heh, i decided to see if eharm likes me now. they seem to think i’m appropriate for their matching system this time around, which is pretty amusing since all stats. and questions are basically the same, garnering the same responses as before.

    but, hey, i like the theory that they just didn’t want to take my money for naught!

    and goodz luck to you on finding a match made in cyber-heaven!

  9. 9 V.

    Good enough for me. I tend to do a lot of improv cooking too (sometimes to Jeff’s chagrin because he has to eat my experiments). I might add some garlic to that recipe. But I have an unhealthy love for garlic.

  10. 10 the soviet

    i had to pay $5 in federal. and no state income tax in tejas. move here!

  11. 11 Amanda

    I feel your pain on New York taxes. Except I still live in the HELLACIOUSPIT, and…I’m just really looking forward to my stimulus check is all I’m saying.

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