For the last six weeks, he has played havoc with my mind, waking me in the dead of night with sharp noms to my face, gnawing on my knuckles withoug
“@#$$Ikj
jlk

You see that?! He just leapt on my laptop. Not a full sentence into my tirade….

Anyway. He gnaws on my knuckles without provocation, frequently springs onto my kitchen table and into my meal, occasionally farts in my general direction, and twice has left little poop skid marks on my sheets. He thinks the spray water bottle I bought to discipline him is the height of tasty refreshment. He has knocked my laptop to the floor twice in the last week. His bits and bobs have claimed as much real estate in my apartment as I have, and he is definitely not paying rent.

Did I mention the 2 a.m. stealth teabagging? The daily vacuuming?

Little shit.

And yet, ZOMG he’s so cuuuuuuuute!

Sigh.


277 Responses to “You know what? My cat is kind of an asshole.”

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