More NO: Ted Nugent edition.

Eh, sometimes the internets hack up something so vile, so unconscionable, so horrifically wrong, I have to shut down and take a humanity hiatus. In this category: “One guy, one cup.” *hurls* I’m not linking it. Ever.

Sometimes, though, the netuwebs belch out something priceless in a “You should just have given me that money to crap on and bury, idiots” sort of way. In that category: news that CMT has given Ted Nugent a show called “Runnin Wild…From Ted Nugent.” In which one irrelevant, misguided, aging ex-rockstar famed for his love of bowhunting hunts people! Or, well, teaches people how to fend for themselves in the wild, and then inspires them to use their new skills whilst evading his 90 lb. draw!

Seriously, TV people: stop giving Ted Nugent air time. Unless you can figure out some way to combine all things Ted (underage girls, biltong, hunting, being a douche) into something original and worthwhile. Anything involving him being tracked down by the underage girls he “dated,” strapped to a chair, and forced to eat raw vegan food until he confesses he’s a smarmy, lying, child-support-dodging tool – something like that would be great. “Ted Nugent: Hunted and Confronted!” I would watch.

You know, I didn’t hate crazy, 17-year-old-Hawaiian-girl-dating Ted Nugent. (Okay, I did.) I love jerky; I want to enjoy his tasty biltong! But crackpot, conservative, gun-waving Ted is just sad.


51 Responses to “More NO: Ted Nugent edition.”

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