Author Archive for Sid Archive Page 0

The 80s are coming back.

But, if we all band together, we can turn back the tide of evil. Simply pledge the following (left hand raised and right hand over heart): I, ____, do hereby pledge never to wear a bubble or poof skirt. Ever. Ever. Everinmylife. I furthermore promise not to make the foolhardy mistake of believing leggings hide […]

Christ-chucking bloody DAMN IT!

I’ve got wee bastard aphids eating my mint! SONS OF BITCHES! Now I have to toss the plant or commit to a course of pesticidal diligence, because I don’t want the fuckers migrating to my basil and tomatoes. I have one window, my only source of natural light. All three pots need to share that […]

Know what I rillyrilly want?

A bacon cheeseburger and a Bass. Is that too much to ask?

1. They can’t possibly mean “resellers.” Because doesn’t that imply it’s been used? Maybe they mean retailers? Distributors? *shrug* Who in the hell would want a used she-pee? 2. I’ve been doing a bit of media recon lately, which means trawling through the mags on the market geared to the 18-35 year old woman of […]

On comedy.

So, I’m watching Sarah Silverman’s Jesus Is Magic. Considering it seemed like every critic in America reviewed this show as though they sat down in their theaters, Silverman appeared onscreen, and the sun commenced immediately to shine out of her ass, I expected some great, irreverent, off-color genius stand-up. Uhhhhm. No. Nope. Not seeing it.* […]